Author Archives: Lib

Throw-Back-Monday: Going Home

I had to go home a little over a week ago. I don’t know when I’ll stop calling it home. I haven’t lived there for nearly 17 years, but for some reason, I still call it home. Maybe because I don’t feel like Atlanta is my final calling and more like a temporary stopover to wherever my home will one day be (which will never be in rural Northern Indiana, I assure you). I don’t know. The thing is, every time I go “home” to that small little town twenty minutes from Michigan, a tiny part of me wishes I wasn’t there. I like remembering how things were, and things have changed so much over the years. Old haunts and locales I thought I’d never forget are sometimes unrecognizable to me now. But then there are the few things that never change – like idiots driving 54 in a 55 on US6 (I curse each and every one of you. Every. Time.) OR Ruth’s and Joe’s house.

I wasn’t “home” for the happiest of situations.  I was home because Joe had passed away. Ruth and Joe are Chelle’s parents. Those of you who read my blog regularly know Chelle’s my best friend in this world.

That's us. Two besties playing it bad ass. That's how we roll.

That’s us. Two besties playing it bad ass at Ruth’s and Joe’s. That’s how we rolled. Still do.

Ruth and Joe were like second parents to me. They were ridiculously supportive in my formative years and beyond. They welcomed me and all of Chelle’s friends into their home asking us to make it our own.  And we did.

The house is down a long gravel lane set back from a country road (for those of you not from these parts – everything is off of a country road). The moment I pulled in, this time in my Acadia in lieu of the old high school Ford Taurus Sedan, I still peeled down the drive like I always did leaving a cloud of white dust in my wake. I remember every time he saw me do it, Joe would say, “There’s Lib. Driving like a bat out of hell.” And yet he still trusted his daughter’s life in my hands as we’d take off for our next big adventure to parts unknown. Ok. They were always known; we were teenagers. So maybe to like the Friday night football game?

Anyway.

I stayed at their house for one night while I was up there. Just walking through the front door brought so many memories rushing back . Maybe some of the furniture had changed, but the feelings the house evoked hadn’t changed at all. I was left alone in it for a little bit, locking things up before the viewing that day.  I took the opportunity to wander around, not knowing when I’d be there again, and smiling as certain moments from events past sprang to mind (For the record, Ruth, I was totally not creeping in your house—  just wandering and reminiscing, NOT CREEPING. I promise!).

Apparently some furniture had stayed the same. I found one of the old couches we used at every get-together. I was surprised we hadn’t completely destroyed it all those years ago.

Just one of many times we used the famous couch for goofy photo ops.

One of many goofy photo ops on Famous Couch

 

Case in point.

Just another case in point.

It was still sitting upstairs in the loft. That’s where we would always be – upstairs in the loft. We’d play euchre. We’d watch movies. We’d enjoyed games like Truth or Dare.

A little Twister.

A little Twister here and there.

We had slumber parties.

Chelle does have pants on. I swear ...???

Chelle does have pants on. I swear …???

Superbowl parties. Dinner parties.

Typical bunch of misfits having dinner at the house.

Typical bunch of misfits having dinner at the house.

We did makeup and hair…

After my brief stroll down memory lane (in a not creepy way remember), I had stepped outside to let the dogs do their business (one was Chelle’s and one was Ruth’s and Joe’s) . I was promised neither one would run away. Apparently that rule only applies when squirrels aren’t in the picture as I watched, completely mortified, as Ruth’s and Joe’s little sweetheart tore off for one of the speedy rodents across the property towards the open field.  So there I was, running over the lawn in sharp high heels, screaming at the top of my lungs in 25 degree temps, trying to stop him when suddenly all of the nights we spent playing capture the flag hit me, too. We’d don black clothes and divvy up into two teams. We’d run covert ops through the woods and over the grassy knolls with only the moonlight to guide our way… For those still worried about the dog, Barkley did make it back to the house while I was lost in my mind – crisis averted. Thank God!

I remembered bonfires and swimming parties. I remembered teepeeing those woods more than once  and hauling ass with Darewood down that damn gravel drive (we’d park by the country road so we wouldn’t be seen – it’d always seem like a smart idea before we tossed the tissue in the trees, but it became the dumbest idea ever as we sprinted back like half a mile in the middle of the night as if our lives depended on it).

I remembered Chelle’s engagement celebration. I remembered sitting on the back porch sharing a glass of wine with Ruth and Joe.

As much as things feel a bit foreign when I’m back now, Ruth’s and Joe’s house made me feel like I was home again. That feeling wasn’t because of the house they’d built, but because of the love they provided to anyone and everyone who stepped foot inside. I am so lucky and thankful for the Blackburn clan who unconditionally adopted me into their family so many years ago. I would do anything for those people as I know they’d do anything for me. I can never thank them enough.

The Blackburn Clan

The Blackburn Clan

I didn’t mean for this post to get so sappy and sentimental as basically every story I have relating to Ruth’s and Joe’s is actually rather crazy, comical, or fun. I was just a bit surprised that day because though I was brought there under sad circumstances, I found my heart wasn’t filled with sadness at all. It was filled with the purest  joy and love as I wandered around reliving those amazing moments we shared. And that’s the way life should be.

For Joe …

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Happy Easter

Happy Easter!

Easter circa '80 or '81 I'm the one in the middle. Yes, the bunny is totally creepy.

Easter circa ’80 or ’81
I’m the one in the middle.
Yes, that bunny is the kind to scare small children… (the look on my face proves it)

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Total-Take-Back: Diet Pepsi

Nastiest pop around.

Nastiest pop around.

My best friend agrees, so it’s kind of official.

Truth.

Truth.

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The Music Challenge #7

When I was writing my pen pal post the other week, it reminded me a lot about my various travels over the years. There are certain cities or locations where music played quite a role in my experience, or at least in remembering my experience there.

Adding to The Music Challenge – songs from around the world. Or rather songs that remind me of being around the world. Continue reading

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Freaky Friday (part deux)

Sorry for the late continuation of last week’s post. I know I left you with a Cliff-hanger (I’ve wanted to use that for the last 16 years- don’t roll your eyes at my moment).You probably thought the neighbors up and buried us in their backyard after the whole The Burbs comparison, but rest assured, that is not what happened. I was just really busy this week. Promise.

Let’s cut to it, shall we?

The dinner …

Were the neighbors nice? Of course.

Was the food good? Outstanding.

Was it awkward? Abso-friggen-lutely.

So that’s pretty much it. What I had wanted to elaborate upon was how I traded places with my husband for one whole week and it was SO. MUCH. FUN.

You’ve seen Freaky Friday, right? Vice Versa? Like Father Like Son? There was a slew of 1970s and 80s films that played out a bodily switch up of sorts between the two main characters in the movie. Whether it was a wish made at the exact same moment, or a weird African potion, or some Thai souvenir skull, the bottom line was that the protagonists swapped bodies for however long and got to experience what it was literally like to wear the other person’s shoes.

So yeah, that didn’t happen to Clifford and me – the swapping bodies thing, to be clear. BUT, I did get to play his role in our lives for one week.

As I’ve mentioned countless times, Clifford hates people. He is the introvert of our twosome. He hates public functions. He hates family dinners. He hates the movies because there are people there. He hates stores because there are people there. The list goes on … And when it comes to more intimate events where the likelihood of him having to interact with another human being increases exponentially, his desire to delay, throw a tantrum, do or say anything to avoid said  interaction increases exponentially as well.

He’s been this way since I met him, though I feel his Grumpy Old Man demeanor (because that’s what I call it) has gotten worse over the years. Sometimes I know he does it just to mess with me, but other times, it’s just a habit that he automatically rejects any social proposal I throw his way.

For instance, let’s discuss time. Clifford goes by what I call “Geiselmayr Time”. He is perpetually late. It’s part of his stalling tactics. It’s also one of my top pet peeves. If Clifford isn’t at least 30-40 minutes late arriving wherever he needs to be, then he’s too early as far as he’s concerned.  I, however, go by “Gross Time”: If you are five minutes early, you are actually late. I thank my father for instilling that in me.  I’ve mentioned the family synchronizing watches at King’s Island before, right?

At least 2 hours before we need to be somewhere, I begin with the reminders. He usually continues to just do whatever it is he’d doing while blatantly ignoring me. Sometimes he whines. Actually, oftentimes he whines about not going and not wanting to do whatever it is we’re doing. Whining about hating people and whining about wanting to stay home. Actually, sometimes the whining is substituted for outright defiance. As I repeatedly remind him where we need to be when, he repeatedly reminds me that he’s not going. I was the one that committed us to xyz, not him, so he doesn’t have to go. This drives me nuts!

About an hour out he might nod as an acknowledgement that my words did not fall upon deaf ears, but he still actively avoids preparing to leave. Usually still whining or reminding me that he’s not going to go and I might as well leave now without him.

30 minutes out, I begin to panic slightly for fear of being late while I begin to nag.

10 minutes out, I go from panicked to fully agitated as I know now, officially, we will not be on time.

About 5 minutes before we need to leave, he starts to move. Finally stopping what he’s doing, he drags himself upstairs and decides he needs to shower. Wherever we’re going, he wants to be clean. Ulcers continue to develop in my stomach as I’m caught in a mix of emotions – frustration, embarrassment, FRUSTRATION, depression, frustration, anxiety, and frustration. Every time we are set to go somewhere, he does this. Every time, we are late.

When I was newer to flying and wanted to be sure we were at the gate in plenty of time so we could be one of the first to board the plane (so not how I fly these days), Clifford, who was quite seasoned in flying the friendly skies, would humor me — at first. He would settle himself next to me at the gate. He’d pull out a magazine or play with his phone while we waited for the attendant to call our zone. Just as they announced our row was boarding, Clifford would turn to me and say, “I’m going to go grab a drink. I’ll be back.” And he’d head to the bar as we were supposed to be entering the plane. I don’t know how I didn’t have a complete meltdown in the middle of the airport back in those days.

So when Clifford came to me about the neighbors and going to dinner with them, I realized this was my golden opportunity for a little payback.

First, I told him in no uncertain terms would I even consider having dinner with the neighbors we actively avoided for the better part of six and a-half years. He didn’t think I was serious. I totally was. He laughed at first like it was a funny har-har kind of thing but then when he realized I was serious, I witnessed the panic slowly creeping in behind his eyes.

As the week progressed, I insisted I wasn’t going. OR that I had something else to do. OR that fine, maybe I’d go, but I’d be on “Geiselmayr Time”. He begged and pleaded and bribed. The day of the event he sent constant reminders which turned into nagging as I ignored them all. He was desperate.

15 minutes prior to, he was speedily pulling in the drive from work so he could quickly change clothes. He rushed upstairs calling to me (I was finishing my makeup in the bathroom, but the door was closed). He asked me if I was ready. The neighbors would be picking us up shortly. That’s when I explained through the door how busy I’d been all day and still needed to take a shower.

Clifford went from this.

Mildly confused and disillusioned.

Mildly confused and disillusioned.

To this.

Full on spastic break-down.

Full-on spastic break-down.

In 5 seconds flat. It was awesome. I felt …validated. For one week, Clifford saw what it was like to be me living with him. It was fantastic.

 

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Freaky Friday (part one)

And the World flipped on its end. Tonight Clifford and I have dinner with the neighbors. And I had NOTHING to do with it. Clifford made a friend.

Two things to note before you go oooing and awwwing over my husband-who-hates-people going all Disney on my ass by making a friend.

  1. We aren’t having dinner with the neighbors we completely hate and are constantly plotting against (for those of you who are familiar with my daily diatribes). So it’s not exactly like I need to pin a medal on my man for going above and beyond.
  2. Our relationship with all of our neighbors is more like something from The Burbs than from Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. i.e. This is going to be SO awkward. Continue reading
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Throw-Back-Monday: Pen Pals

In hindsight, I was destined to marry a foreigner. Some people are born to marry a NASCAR fan, or a banker, or insert whatever “type” you have here ___________.

I’ve always been fascinated by cultures outside of my own. Toss in a pair of puppy dog eyes and a sexy accent – I’m sold. No offense to my hot red-blooded American men, though I adore you, the spark was never going to be the same. We would have been like a one dimensional 4th of July fountain fizzling out far too quickly whereas me and a man from a foreign land would be like those crazy aerial cakes shooting for the stars in multi-colored glory leaving lingering picturesque impressions in the skies.

I owe my destiny (and type) to that of pen pal writing. Continue reading

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A Taxidermy Adventure (guest post)

Today’s guest post is by a friend from the Hoosier State – Alyse Small. Alyse happily welcomes a foray into the wildly unknown. Which is what it’s all about, folks!

 

This thing will kinda make sense, but I’ll explain why at the end.

So I found a bird in the yard of a local urgent care center. It took me approximately five full minutes of talking to my boyfriend to decide to go snatch this dead bird. I wanted it because it’s yellow and it’s a bird I’ve never seen before. It’s amazing and I freaked out the whole time I went to pick it up thinking someone was gonna come out and yell at me or call me crazy because I’m just hanging out at an urgent care clinic picking up dead birds. Anyway, I get it in my car, I get it home, and I call my mom to tell her about it. Then I send her a picture so she can Google what the hell it is. Turns out it’s a Western Meadowlark and it’s not even supposed to be native to Indiana. (Thanks global climate change.)

Look at it though. It’s glorious.

A very dead but GLORIOUS Western Meadowlark.

A very dead but GLORIOUS Western Meadowlark.

Continue reading

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Throw-Back-Monday: School Dances

School dances had so much potential back in the day. If you eliminated the angsty teen melodramas, the pubertal hardships, the unrequited crushes, and the desperate need to be accepted by your peers at all costs, dances were the perfect events for letting loose and having a genuinely good time. A time made all the more merry by the music being played.

Unless you had a significant other that week, you typically went with a group of friends. You also typically cleared the dance floor the moment a slow song came on. You promptly exited the cafeteria floor (that’s where a lot of my school dances were) because it was time to claim your location on the wall. The slow songs were terrible and the country songs thrown in made my stomach turn. Even then, surrounded by farmers and Country-Western-loving-fiends, I hated Country music.

BUT, once the painfully depressing slow song segment would end, it was back to business. Shimmying and shaking to Billboard’s top hits. There were always those songs that got everyone going like YMCA and The Loco-Motion.  And then there were the everyday chart toppers with a few old school songs thrown in to boot. A little Madonna, a little Prince, a little NKOTB … school dances could easily be a fun, safe and pretty upright way to spend a Friday night with your friends. And yes, I am well aware things have changed – OR maybe they haven’t changed as much as we might think. Continue reading

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My Sister’s House

I considered anthropological studies at one point. The human species is a fascinating subject. Obviously I landed in other fields, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still enjoy the observation of my fellow people in their natural habitats.

Every time I walk into my sister’s house I feel like Dian Fossey observing the Mountain Gorillas of Rwanda. I’m studying not a culture but a species I don’t really understand, but captivates me nonetheless. It can be amusing, scary, disgusting, shocking, and joyous all at the same time. What I witness at my sister’s house is enlightening. Like learning another language. Like trying an exotic food. From the smells, to the sounds, to the visuals overloading my senses, I can’t help but be in awe. In awe, yes, but I also find myself disturbed. Always very disturbed… Continue reading

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