Tag Archives: idiots

A Conversation With Clifford III

jean shorts

Sometimes Clifford is so precious, I want to put him in my pocket and take him with me everywhere.

Today, on the phone, Clifford was downtown trying to find parking near Piedmont Park. The people watching had him a bit off-kilter…

Clifford: What the fuck? Who the hell would cut their shorts so short their pockets are hang out?

Me: They likely didn’t cut them like that, sweetie. You buy them like that these days. It’s an acutal thing.

Clifford: What the hell?!!!

Me: Yes. In fact, they are probably designer.

Clifford: So you’re telling me that someone paid a lot of money for shorts with pockets hanging out of them on purpose?

Me: Yes, basically, yeah.

Clifford: No wonder we are so fucking screwed. We have idiots who are stupid enough to pay for designer shorts with pockets hanging out of them responsible for Clinton or Trump becoming the next president.  What the fuck is this world coming to?


Scripps Made Me Laugh – Then Cry

Stupid header

During the 5th grade spelling bee, I went out on the word flamingo. Two m’s. I had made it to the final three or four. Jonathan Stair picked up my slack, having spelled flamingo correctly, and ran with it. He may have won the whole thing, I can’t quite recall. So having participated in at least one bee back in the day, I appreciate the preparation and the stress that goes into such an endeavor. I watch the Scripps National Spelling Bee blips on the net here and there and am so stoked my spelling bee days never made it beyond the New Paris Elementary gym floor.

So when this popped up into my Twitter timeline this week, I nearly spit out my drink. Continue reading